Thoughts on pain and Barbecues 31-05-09

I have major/life-threatening damage to my tongue and foot. Hayley kicked me in the face twice for as yet unknown reasons and I am still trying to think of ways to blame her for the foot injury which was mostly caused by me kicking a bag full of bottles.
Carlos very kindly went to Brazil so that we could sample the local beef, and then dragged it through an enormous amount of salt and put it on the barbecue, where it was cooked by Matt. We were then careful to slice it up using the same knife and fork we had previously used to slice up the raw chicken and enjoyed it very much.
Carlos reminds me of an interesting fact about Brazil nuts that I learned in Australia. Brazil nuts fall to the floor encased in a remarkably tough outer shell which only one animal can chew through, that being the Agouti, a pointy rabbit with an excellent memory. This way the nuts are protected from being eaten by other animals. However the shell is so tough that even the shoot of the nut itself cannot get through. This means that the only brazil nut trees that ever grow occur when an Agouti finds a nut, nibbles the end off, then buries it and dies, thus forgetting where it buried it – and allowing the shoot to grow out through the hole.
The temperature of the surface of the sun is 6000 degrees but in the centre it is exactly 15 million degrees.
Paul has been in the garden doing Yoga for 8 minutes.
If you have 16 sausages and 7 equally-hungry people they should get 2.28 sausages each.
Right now a red kite is circling overhead.
Gemma had a birthday party yesterday which was mostly a barbecue and an exchanging of strange gifts. The central gift was a paddling pool full of 4500 buttons, which was well received although it is worth pointing out that she has an almost irrational love of buttons. The pool makes an excellent goal for my lightweight football which almost everyone kicked over the fence at some point, but I got told off for kicking it into the buttons and sullying them.
Sarah is now starting the barbecue again. This is a bit like being in Australia – where you start the barbecue every time you get hungry and they love it so much the council puts out public barbecues with gas and trowels to scrape them clean with. The garden is now full of the swirling ash of Brazilian beef and Stephen Fung.